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Tuesday, October 2, 2018

TURNING THE PAGE........

Tuesday 29th May 2017


Intro Quote:
 Life is like a book, filled with many chapters, it is how you read it that determines your road





Well, I have been back in Holland for working purposes for 9 weeks (except for a week visit back home) and what are my conclusions?

If I am really honest with myself, I really thought, or hoped, things would be like they were before I went to France, but this is not the case and in fact, things couldn't be further from the truth.

I have the feeling everyone has changed and their attitudes are distancing them from me, but here is where I am totally wrong. Nobody from that time in my life has changed, in fact, they are exactly as they were back then: the same look at life and humour etc, and don't get me wrong, this is not a bad thing, it can be a good thing, stability, but not for me.
No, my friends, it is me who has changed, I am moving forward, (thanks to my life in France), it is me who is slowly distancing myself from a past life, from a life living off an ego. This is a good thing for me I know, but it is losing me friends from then. This is no-one's fault, it is just life. I have to move forward or I get bored very easily. This was a very hard thing for me to admit to myself, but finally that I can and as I reach my 60th birthday I acknowledge it and hopefully, I can move on and the people who are meant to stay in my life, will move forward with me or at least understand or respect my views.

Another negative point for myself: living, here again, I feel myself being pulled back to that way or time in my life I was trying to escape, the heavy drinking, the ego trip etc. Now I know some may see this is a negative, narcissistic view of how they live their life, but I honestly do not mean that. I have been there, I have the t-shirt, but I want to move forward, not backwards......

I honestly loved living here and even when I was chilling in France I was under the illusion that was where I wanted and had to be to move forward, but within a few days of being back, it was evidential to me, I was wrong, I do not feel at home anymore in Alkmaar, of course staying with my brother is a plus point and that helps and seeing family (especially seeing little Vincent for the first time) is most definitely another plus, but it just feels like a working holiday to me.

My heart belongs in France and of course missing my Aingeal Sol is ripping a hole in my heart and not being able to play with our Bruce is another thing I really miss, but also the way of life in France is better suited to the way I look at life nowadays. I feel the songs I write are much better. This I now admit to myself.

So this visit to Holland is good for me. It has opened my eyes to things that are a happy memory, but that time has passed and to move forward there they must remain. With the selling of my house in Alkmaar slowly I can close this chapter of my life. I know I will be back in Holland to work or visit, but I think that is all. Luckily with the internet, contact with family and friends with never be far away.

So again life is like a book, with many chapters, but we just have to learn to close one chapter before we move on to the next one.

Tuesday, July 3, 2018

WHAT TO DO,MY DEAR RUPERT.....



Well, after 2 and a half years, I finally managed to finish the long-awaited 'Spaced out on Planet Bizarre' album and like a good Libra musician there are lots I am unhappy with, but I have finally learned to embrace closure on a project. Unlike the 'Idiots seeking sanctuary at the Armageddon' album, which I kept chopping and changing the songs and their place on the album. It got near to obsession trying to finish it until a good friend told me to stop and just bring it out and I did, but like I said this time, although I had a few other tracks I wanted on the album, but for one reason or another, I couldn't finish them.
 One such track is 'the Eruption', but I think I will get the band to play it



I picked the 1st of July as the release date and worked towards that date and yes yes, for those that really know me, will laugh when they hear I was still recording vocals and mixing on 2 different tracks on the last few days before release, so predictable. 




BUT HEY, WHAT NOW MY DEAR RUPERT?


Well, let me tell you, my dear Hubert. There are very major changes in my life on the horizon, but for now, I will keep that news to myself. I love my life and I totally love Sol, but changes need to be made for me to progress as a person and what others think of my life or what I do with it, then that is totally none of my business. I have my opinion of that, but that IS my business.

I also have to be honest with myself, I realise people are just not warming up to projects, my music, my novel, my tabloid. Thus I am planning lots of changes in everything I do and the way that I work and my expectations, it is time to get back to doing stuff for me and not so that others like me or my stuff, but ha ha ha I have just realised since this blog is also a project of mine, probably no-one is reading it and so I am talking to my inner self, which is actually very cool.

"Hi Inner Zeek!!!"

Anyway, for now, I am busy with advertisements for the album and I will try to get a video made for 'the Rain' track. This is a song I think might finally get more people interested in my music. I have already had some very good feedback from people, who have heard the song.

I want to finish my novel. 'The panty thief of Foddleburg', this is another project that has been dragging on too long and it needs to be finished
There is also 'the Fools Funnybone 3' I have some funny stories I have to write. I have acoustic songs for the Zeek D'Accoustique album, I want to record this year or next.


Plus, hopefully, we can finally record an album with ZEEKtheFREAK (as a band) and get back to some serious gigs. Although I want to start avoiding the bars and play more venues and festivals, but that is for the future.

I have ideas for the next solo album, which hopefully will not be in 10 years ha ha ha



I am proud of everything I do, I love what I do and it does not matter where I do it or with whom, I will continue to do my thing, but now I know for certain, I am gonna do stuff that pleases me and if people come along for the ride, I will embrace your presence, but if you ignore my work or are negative about it, please, there is the door don't let it hit your arse on the way out. I have no time or honestly want nothing to do with negative people....lighten up, respect another's work, ye fannies...LOL

Do you realise I have been accused once by a so-called friend, you know the 'no I won't pay 90 cents for your song, because I saw one gig and I don't like your music' type of friend, that I have no sense of humour. Now they are particularly correct, I do not have THEIR sense of humour, but seriously even after 2 Fools Funnybone's...FFS


But to anyone bothering to read this, what are you doing you nutter? You do realise people will talk about you and even disown you, run away now while you still have your sanity, Ha ha ha, but I am glad you are about and sharing my dream. 



I wish everyone nothing but happiness....now buy my album you bastards


SPACED OUT ON PLANET BIZARRE 




Tuesday, May 29, 2018

A JESTER OR JUST A CLOWN

WHAT IS FUNNY & WHAT IS NOT?

   .  .  .



When we, as civilised human beings, characterize our humour, it is that we laugh at things WE feel are funny. Our humour is defined by how we see it, but only through our own eyes, not through the eyes of another. It's all to do with the Theory of relativity, I think they would call it.

I know, I am no different to the next guy. I know there are different levels (or maybe styles is a better word) of humour. That is fine and normal, but it is when pride enters the scene that things start to get complicated and disrespectful.

Of course, I admit that with my humour I try to open people's eyes to the funny side of laughing at oneself and yes, I can see that some people might find this provoking, but I think that says more about that person than it does my humour.


THE BIRTH OF MY HUMOUR

For me, my first impression of a world that would shape my humour was when I was young and the contact I had with my Granny Barrowman. She was a nutcase, but I just loved going to see her. She said the silliest of comments, made up words and did all sorts of zany things, she would, for example, turn her dress back to front and walk into the room backwards, speaking backwards as well. She is totally the funniest person I ever have and probably ever will meet. I think my cousin Marilyn and myself come closest to being like her.

Then came the TV and influences from such things as the Goons and a tv programme: Do not adjust your sets or Michael Bentine and a bit later with the likes of Monty Python, the Bonzo dog doo dah band or the children's tv programme Tizwas and most certainly my hero Spike Milligan. Throw in some Zappa and you start to understand my sense of humour. Latter-days, I have taken to following Bill Murray and just love his dry humour.


But what makes others laugh?


I look at what makes others laugh and think: seriously???? really????

The likes of Chubby Brown makes my toes curl.
Along with those other so-called funnymen who ridicule people, gender, sickness, race etc. Saying twat cunt fucking every 2nd word I seriously do not find funny and although I have difficulty understanding why others do, I respect that, because that is life and everyone has the right to like it. I understand when someone else is being ridiculed, it takes the attention away from their own faults...logical




But back to the real story behind this blog. As most know, I make a fake tabloid called the Fools  Funnybone. 4 pages of news, sport, entertainment, lots of Ads etc, all things I think up and write over the course of 4 months. I carry pen an paper everywhere and my mobile for quick ideas.




Well now I have to be totally honest, although I do write some stuff in the 4 months, 75% is written in the last month. Yes, we Libra's are known for working at the last minute under pressure to reach a deadline.


I honestly think it's funny and my rule on writing is, if it makes me smile, giggle or laugh, then I presume it is funny.....



but there is where my connection with most of my family and most of my friends and acquaintances seems to end because I fear they just don't get my humour. So it had me thinking a few things......


Am I just not funny?


I totally understand, that maybe I am only a legend in my own shoes, after all, I get that not everyone will get or respects my humour. This thought I can live with because I totally stand behind the belief that we are all different and we should be. It makes this world more interesting......

but then I ask if it is decided I have no talent.....Who decides what talent is?





I do not mean the crappy talent shows on tv, I honestly rarely watch them, because although I totally believe the person is probably brilliant at what they do, all I see is remakes of famous people, they sing like a famous singer or dance like them. I have to be serious if I ever have watched such a programme I see very little originality. I understand these shit shows are purely there to make money. I also see men and woman singers/artists or whatever, with no talent, but flash a nipple or a bit of knicker and they are a hit.






For example, think of that song from Sabrina: Boys boys boys...fucking terrible, but because there was a hint of nipple, yep, massive hit....or tit in her case LOL).






I do however have an idea for a ZEEKtheFREAK video, I will reveal in a later blog.


but, why are people so afraid of liking originality or something new?


As my mother used to say, act normal and you will act daft enough. You see, when I was growing up in the 60's, we still had to follow the golden rules to being a grown-up, get a job, find a wife, have kids, get a mortgage, get an ulcer and probably die unhappy wishing we had done the things we had dreamt of.....

but you guessed it, the Anarchist in me, just could not and still cannot abide by these rules. Why should I, it is my life, not yours, not my parents, not society but mine. I have a lot of problems with people, not police or that, but people in general who attack my way of life., all because they have a shit life....and thus they believe so should I.


and so we come to this......

Is it just jealousy?

I have to be truthful about this view, I know for a fact, that this for many to be true. I have been disappointed by a lot of people, who think they are cool but they are very jealous of my situation. They have become the way their parents and society want them to be and believe me I think that is fine, but if out of jealousy you attack or do not support someone following what they believe in, then you are...and this is just my opinion...a sad bastard. What is wrong with helping someone achieve their dreams, as they at least try to do something with their lives, but just because you wish it was you, you do not help them. 

People, do not write them off, support them in every way you can.......


and please, do not get me started on the childish attitude of........If I ignore them, they will stop that and go away and do normal things, they will stop embarrassing me...ha ha ha...sorry your stupid pride is embarrassing you.

and with that in mind, and finally ffs, we come to.....


THE FOOLS FUNNYBONE


I totally love making it, it is a part of me, I have to get out there.

When I made number 1, I did receive a few positive comments and one negative one. The negative one I have respect for, because the person was honest, saying that although they respected all my work, it was just not their humour. Which is fair enough.

I thought I would have received much more positive or even negative comments but very people felt the need to react, after all, it was my project, not theirs. I did, however, feel that people didn't react because it was new, maybe a bit strange in their eyes and they had to get acquainted with my humour.....fair point.




But then I made number 2. I learnt a lot from making number 1 and I seriously thought the second one was much much funnier.

I always wanted to keep it a free and a tabloid that was available to everyone, thus trying to spread as much of my humour on Cyberspace as I could, I asked friends, family to spread the word, share the posts on Facebook, Twitter or just tell a friend, pass it on as word of mouth is the best publicity one can get. I think 3 people from my 750+ friends on Facebook helped out and I have received only one reaction (thanks Pam, Addie and Thijs :) )

I am lost for words. I thought people I knew were friends with me because apart from me being a really great guy (a modest cough) they had a similar sense of humour.....hmm!!! this is food for thought.


So it brings me to the future plans for the tabloid. I will always continue to make it, I love laughing and making people laugh, I have a gift, I know, but the chances are it will no longer be available to everyone and only a selected few, who really like it, will receive it.

I think I will start an email list to find out who wants it or not, because yes, I know I have always said, I make it for me, but it is nice when people give one a compliment for all the hard work, surely one ad or story made you giggle....then tell me. You may not realise how much that means. But think of yourself, if you do/make/create something and someone says. that is cool, well done. Remember the nice feeling?

I do believe I am funny, but then again am I just, but that's just me.......




IN CONCLUSION:


This is just my opinion of things, but If you disagree with anything I say, or you have any other comments to make or maybe you would just like to leave a compliment, please feel free to leave comments here below. I welcome your views 

or please go to:     THE FOOLS FUNNYBONE

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

ARE THEY COMING OR GOING?

As I start to write this, I am disturbed by some small birds outside fighting over a food ball, we hang outside for them to eat during the winter months. 

They are fighting to survive if they don't eat, they die,  it is as simple as that, I would love to compare this with society but that was in Neanderthal times today all the aggression, the stress, the fights are about who has the coolest car or biggest TV or most money. We are always rushing here, hurrying there, flying around and are either too busy or too ignorant to notice the beautiful things happening around us.



This came to me as I walked our pee monster around the asparagus fields near where we live, earlier this morning. I stopped next to the fence that divides the fields from the motorway, the A7 or the 'route de Soleil' as it is known, it carries people south from Lyon to Marseille or the other way north. It also leads to other motorways that will take you to such exotic places as Spain or Italy or further afield. It is a very busy motorway, 3 lanes of constantly moving traffic. Even at night, you can hear the long-distance lorries haul their loads to a far-off destination. 




In the summertime it is filled with tourists coming to feel the warmth of the sun in this beautiful part of the world, because summers are warm here, very warm, something my Scottish blood has had to acclimatise to and now I love it and have even been known to have a wee moan in the winter, because "It's chilly", something that makes Mrs Freak laugh out loud.
But as I stare at the motorway, I can hardly see the faces of the driver and the passengers, because of their excess speed, but I guess some are happy some are sad, but I know lots of people are stressed because that is the norm in society today, if you are not working hard, breaking your balls over something, you are lazy sod. But why? Where are they rushing too?
When passing this part of the world, the beauty and the scenery all around you is breathtaking, but why in this day and age do people not have the time to live for the moment, to enjoy this beautiful world, to just stop for a second and look around you, breath in the air, be happy that you are alive. No society today is controlled by 'money'. We have to earn more and more, we need the newest gadgets. I saw an advertisement for the new mobile phone, I can't remember if it was an iPhone or a Samsung, but the thing cost more than €1100.......let that sink in, €1100, holy crap....for what? 
Because it recognises you by your pube hair 
or something stupid like that.
Since I moved here I am honestly beginning to realise how much I do not need the newest things. Yes, I do need technology like the internet for putting my work out there and for keeping in touch with family, but it is getting less and less. The social sites I used to be obsessed with, things like Facebook are starting to lose their appeal to me. It used to be very important for spreading my work, but nowadays no-one gives a flying 'fuck' that you spend hours, days, months working on your projects, it has no meaning to even people very close to me. Mrs Freak warned me a few years back to stop selling my soul on Facebook, just to get a euro from family and friends, man, she was right, people nowadays want everything for free. 

But as usual I diverse and that has nothing to do with what this blog is about. 

Let's get back to the motorway and the stressed people... remember...okayI have always had an interest in people. When I lived in Alkmaar and I had some free time, I would go up to the station and get some coffee and just sit and watch the world and the people pass me by. Wondering what they were thinking about, the work, the football, the mortgage or whatever and yes, of course, check out the babes as well, but mostly watching how people were rushing around, not even taking the time to apologise if they bumped into someone else, because they were worried about tomorrow and were not living in the moment. In the NOW
And now I stare at the cars on the motorway, in the same way. There are a lot of accidents in this part of the motorway because people are rushing, not living in the moment, thinking ahead and not looking where they are driving.


I am sure some people have a genuine excuse for rushing someplace. I myself hate being late for an appointment or a gig, but if people are rushing because it concerns money then I feel it is wrong or if it concerns work because your boss will push you to work harder, but don't forget, he gets the profits and all you get is a burnout, 
My friends, I am not provoking anarchy, enticing everyone to stop working or down tools and become hippies. Hell no, society would crumble then, but that you should just enjoy this moment. Stop reading, look around you and embrace your life, look outside, even if the weather is crap, it still has it's charms.

Yesterday, Mrs Freak and I spoke about people we knew that had committed suicide, I know it is morbid and totally different feeling to the blog, 
My point is. Your life is a but a short time or this earth, so enjoy it. If you hate something in your life, change it, if you have always had a dream, go for it. It might not be easy and you might fail, but when you are old and grey and sitting in the old persons home, you can at least look back and smile that you tried to do it.

I have many many stories of my younger years, yes some things I did were stupid, but I honestly have no regrets and I guarantee you my memoirs are gonna be brilliant.

But that is then, the future, this is now, stop and ask yourself...

Are you coming or going? Or are you living for the moment?


Stop worrying about tomorrow, enjoy today. 
I will end with a quote from an old Irish friend, 
who was also a philosopher.
"There is only one day of the week and that is today. Yesterday has passed and tomorrow has yet to appear, so embrace the moment."

That is probably the best advice you can get in this hectic world


CONCLUSION
This blog is just my opinion of things, but if you disagree with anything I say or you have any other comments to make. Please feel free to add them here below. I welcome your views

Or you can email me at info@zeek.org.uk